


Letter to Me

by Moon Faery (tsukinofaerii)



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Dark, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-22
Updated: 2010-03-22
Packaged: 2017-10-08 05:47:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/73349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsukinofaerii/pseuds/Moon%20Faery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After returning home, everything seems outwardly perfect. But inside Sora there's at least one person who's not pleased with the outcome of the adventure, and he has the means to make certain Sora knows it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letter to Me

Hello, Myself. Or maybe you prefer Sora?

Have you ever looked in the mirror and seen the part of you that you hate? The part who hates Riku for every time he beat you and then gloated? And hates him even more now that he won't fight you at all? Or who knows Kairi will cry when you tell her you're gay, and is looking forward to it just so she'll stop bugging you? Who _enjoyed_ killing the Organization? Who admits that it was murder, no matter what noble cause it was for?

That's me. Actually, I'm yours. Or maybe you're the part of _me_ who's ashamed of all that. Kind of depends on where you're standing.

I bet you never thought you'd hear from me again. Hell, _I_ didn't think I'd get a chance like this. You don't exactly fall asleep at the keyboard much, do you? I may be a just a shadow, but I can still type for you. I can even flip a coin or snap my - _your_ \- fingers. Isn't that fascinating?

Just don't fall asleep too close to a knife. Or anything—any_one_—you care too much about. I don't really have much to live for anymore, do I?

Do you think Riku can sleep at night, knowing what he did? How he trapped and tricked me into giving up my _existence_ by disguising it as some kind of noble cause? Was it worth it? What if I had known what would happen? What it would take from me? That Axel would die, that _I_ would die, that we'd lose every chance we almost had? Riku could have taken his fucking _universe_, his personal little horror story and shoved it.

But I didn't even know who Axel was, so maybe it wouldn't have made much difference. No, I know it wouldn't have. I would have been glad to see him die. He was one of _them_, and I was enough of you to want them all dead. But I remember now. DiZ's brainwashing couldn't last long after we'd merged. If you really try hard, you can remember him too. Every sweatdrop, every scream and moan and how _hot_ he was inside, like a blast furnace. My dick had _blisters_ after our first time. You don't have the scars where he melted fingerprints on my back every time he came, but you _know_ how much I loved every time we almost fucked each other to death.

I hate you for taking that away, even more than you hate me for all those little shames I represent. I didn't even know I loved him until it was too late. Now you're using all that love on _him_, and it's supposed to be _mine_. For _Axel_. Like Riku _deserves_ that sort of emotion. Like you have any _right_ to it. But you're giving it to that bastard who defeated me and then locked me in this cage of flesh called _you_.

As soon as you get the guts to tell him, that is. Will you? Ever?

Coward.

Here's another reason not to tell him. He loves you back. Even I can tell that, and I _know_ you, like you're afraid to know yourself. You'd be screwing like jackrabbits inside a week. Eventually you'd fall asleep next to him. And he'd be mine. Maybe you'll like waking up next to his strangled corpse. It's the least I can do for my _Other_. And then maybe you'll kill yourself and save me the trouble.

I'd say I'll be seeing you, but I have a feeling you're not going to look yourself in the eye for a long time.

Sleep well, Sora.


End file.
